Monday 20 April 2009

Dream: some how for some reason Andy who used to be at the restaurant and Zoë from Baker Street appear to be getting it on while playing mobile phone games. This is a weird one. And Jesus what is it that I don’t have?

Things feel strange this morning. Outside it is misty and slightly chilled. I bet by the end of the day it will be sunny and warm meaning my coat will be unnecessary and a nuisance.

Today is a bad hair day. Not my first one of recent memory, I seriously need to go get a haircut.

On the train this morning I do not manage to get my usual seat, the one tucked away in the corner meaning I have nobody behind me and where I can just curl up against the wall and fall asleep. Instead the seat I sit in this morning has noticeably less leg room than my usual throne, this doesn’t look very good.

At Kelvedon some guy in a suit sits next to me and thankfully doesn’t crowd the plate too much. This unfortunately cannot be said for the man gets on at Witham and decides to sit opposite. This man is the tallest man in Essex, the tallest person I have probably ever seen on the commute. As a result of this his lanky fucking legs protrude meaning I am unable to move my own. Every morning I already sit on the balls of my feet but now I am expected to sit completely still and frigid.

As the journey continues my legs begin to tighten up and I begin to experience the most painful train I have ever had – this is why people wear silly socks on aeroplanes. The shooting pain begins to overwhelm me I make my agony clear to the lanky cunt opposite me in the hope he will move also. No dice. Soon thankfully though the unendurable ride is over and as soon as it is possible I stand up and get off the train almost running. As I do so I walk wonky to emphasise to the tall guy just how close he has come to crippling me. He doesn’t care.

By the time I get to work thankfully the blood has returned to my legs and normality resumes. Today I remember to bring in the copy of “Grace” by Jeff Buckley to Nora for her daughter that I actually bought for Gyle as a present about three or four years ago. When I picked the CD up this morning it was caked in dust and still in shrinkwrap. It is pretty coincidental that it will now be eventually ending up in the hands of another Filipino person as I do my part to fuel and improve the music tastes of a future generation and guide it towards good music and away from Alexandra Burke.

Today is a fiery morning, I am very busy in the build up to tomorrows BIG deadline. I begin the day still with a long list of jobs/work still to do but soon it gets added to extensively.

My boss is today processing the monthly wages and mid morning he informs me that they are increasing my salary backdated to January and that having met the deadlines (in theory) we are still getting the bonus. This is scary money.

I manage to suppress my glee at this good news. I do not tell anybody in the office, not even the other person getting a bonus. Also I barely tell any of my friends for appearing to be gloating too much in the style of David Brent at the end of the first series of The Office. That said it is slightly sad that I have nobody to head out to celebrate it with.

As the day paces by my list, being added to by the hour, doesn’t get any shorter and the day becomes something of an exercise into papering up the cracks in certain areas. At the end of the day there is some kind of inquisition into the accounts, as the directors get involved in reviewing.

Eventually I get out the office at 7PM tonight. When I get to Liverpool Street the trains are fucked due to signal/cable problems at Bethnal Green meaning I wind up getting home around 9.40PM.

Back home I wind up cooking lots of bad BBQ chicken wings in the microwave (that I swear are not fit for consumption) while grazing/picking at Jalapeno houmous with pitta bread.

Tonight is the final Stewart Lee Comedy Vehicle, the religion episode that was supposed to have been broadcast last week (at Easter) originally. This week’s episode comes complete with a Jesus Lizard joke and alt rock credibility. It’s only a so so episode in an OK ending to a great series.

In the end I fall asleep watching the Sam Kinison DVD I had on back order from Play. It’s not great.